Co-Parenting Shared Expenses List: What's Usually Split

After parents split, they still have a financial obligation to their children. It's assumed that the custodial parent will take on most of the child's living costs, so courts often order child support to even out the responsibility. Child support covers essentials like food and utility bills (and usually does not cover them 100%). Co-parents must figure out how they will split other expenses.

A co-parenting shared expenses list encourages parents to be honest with one another, collaborate and contribute to their child's needs. It also helps you stay organized and make a plan for paying these expenses.

Why you should make a co-parenting shared expenses list

Creating a co-parenting shared expenses list is the optimal way to budget how much you spend on child-related expenses. You'll know which essentials are covered by child support and what needs to be shared between co-parents so you stay within your means. It also helps you keep track of how much each parent contributes.

If you were previously married, you should also separate expenses paid for with alimony versus child support.

Co-parenting shared expenses list

It's recommended you include your co-parenting shared expenses list in your parenting plan so that it can become legally enforceable after it is filed and approved by the proper court. Alternatively, if you trust one another enough to contribute, you can maintain your child's shopping list separately.

When creating a parenting plan, include your expense list along with a breakdown of how much of the cost each parent is expected to cover.

You can customize this to fit your situation with Custody X Change.

(If you're using the Custody X Change parenting plan template and don't see the expense you're looking for, simply type it in the "custom provision" box.)

Since these are shared expenses, you should try to create the list with your co-parent. Give a clear picture of exactly what your child needs. Include only common or expected expenses; your parenting plan can include a clause stating you'll discuss other expenses as needed.

There are a lot of possibilities. Here are some example categories and expenses.

Personal care

• Toiletries
• Makeup
• Salon and barber services

Education

• School supplies
• Private school tuition
• School uniforms
• Tutoring
• Music lessons
• Driver's education
• Religious education
• Yearbook photos
• Field trips

Uninsured medical costs

• Monthly premiums
• Co-payments
• Medical equipment
• Over-the-counter medication

Extracurriculars

• School events (e.g, prom)
• Uniforms and equipment
• Instruments
• Vacations (i.e., airfare, lodging)
• Concert tickets

Electronic devices

• Cell phones
• Laptops
• Tablets
• Video game consoles

Recurring bills

• Internet service
• Cell phone service
• Subscriptions for streaming, video games, etc.

Child care

• Babysitter
• Daycare
• Day camp
• Supervised visitation

Transportation

• Fares for bus, subway, etc.
• Costs for transporting the child to and from visits (if a parent lives a significant distance away)
• Car payments, maintenance, gas for your teen's car

Miscellaneous

• Birthday and Christmas gifts
• Your child's allowance
• Your child's credit card bill
• Emergency funds
• Co-parenting app subscription

Unapproved expenses

You might also make a list of unapproved shared expenses so each parent knows what they are not obligated to contribute to.

• Clothing beyond what is necessary
• Toys for a child who already has many
• Vapes and other potentially dangerous items
• Piercings, tattoos and other body modifications that aren't medically necessary
• Any expense not previously agreed to

Paying co-parenting shared expenses

Choose a method that suits your conflict level, financial responsibility and willingness to work together. Each parent should keep records of their payments.

Pay from the same account

If you have a highly collaborative, amicable co-parenting relationship, you could open a joint bank account or a bank account for your child to which you'll contribute equally. Both parents (and the child if they're responsible enough) will have access so they can debit the cost of child related expenses.

Pay by expense type

If you're somewhat amicable but not close enough to have a joint account, you could designate certain expenses to each parent. For example, if one parent decides that the child should play soccer, they would incur all those costs. Make sure there's a fair split.

Pay and invoice later

Parents at any conflict level, but particularly high-conflict co-parents, could benefit from paying for items on the shared expense list individually, then invoicing one another for partial repayment of the cost. This limits how often you have to communicate.

Tips for handling co-parenting shared expenses

• Keep a record of payments and repayments
• Set limits on how much you can spend
• Set deadlines for repayments
• If you're unsure about a purchase, ask for your co-parent's approval
• Try mediation before going to court over expense disagreements
• Don't use your child as a messenger to tell your co-parent what they need to buy or how much they owe

Managing co-parenting expenses

Excel spreadsheets and finance apps can help you itemize child related expenses and monitor your spending, but the easiest way to manage shared co-parenting expenses is Custody X Change.

Our expense tracker lets you:

• Add one-time and recurring expenses, including child support
• Log repayments
• Attach receipts as further proof of purchase
• See exactly how much was paid and what you owe

Custody X Change does the math for you so you get back the amount you're owed.

You can customize this to fit your situation with Custody X Change.

If both parents have Custody X Change accounts, you'll receive notifications whenever a new expense is added, repaid or rejected, and you can civilly discuss purchases with parent-to-parent messaging.

You can customize this to fit your situation with Custody X Change.

You'll get a printable record that you can use to invoice the other parent, or present in court if necessary. You can even select the date range of expenses that will appear in the report.

You can customize this to fit your situation with Custody X Change.

Managing expenses with Custody X Change means fewer headaches and a stronger co-parenting relationship.